Case File: Open

Custom songs for real people, assembled bands, and suspiciously specific occasions.

“Tell me the story. I’ll build the band.”

Birthdays, weddings, pets, retirements, trips, teams, inside jokes, and the occasional emotional reckoning — produced from your story into a song people will actually remember.

How It Works

Send the story

Fill out the intake form. Tell me who it’s for, what happened, what should absolutely be included, and what should absolutely be left out. The more specific, the better. Weird details are extremely welcome.

I shape the song

I turn the details into lyrics, choose the musical direction, generate and curate versions using AI-assisted tools, and polish the final track. You’re getting human judgment, taste, and editing — assembled to order, not produced on autopilot.

You deliver the evidence

You get an MP3, lyrics, and optional video clip ready to send, play at a party, or hand over as the kind of gift that gets quoted years later. I confirm scope, send a payment link, and deliver on your timeline.

The process:  ① Fill intake form  →  ② I confirm scope  →  ③ I send payment link  →  ④ You receive the goods

Not a Song Machine.

There are plenty of tools that will generate a song in two minutes from a text field and a genre dropdown. This is not that.

The Impostor is for stories that need judgment: the joke that has to actually land, the name that must be pronounced correctly, the heartfelt line that cannot sound generic, and the detail that makes everyone at the party say, “Wait — how did it know that?”

Instant Song Generator The Impostor
Fast outputvs.Human-shaped result
Generic intakevs.Story-first intake
One-pass generationvs.Curation and editing
Cheap noveltyvs.Custom gift
Self-servicevs.Personal creative service

If you want a song in 90 seconds, there are free tools for that.
If you want a song someone will still be talking about in three years — start a request.

What You Can Order

If there’s a story in it, there’s a song in it. These are the usual suspects.

🎂Birthday Songs
💍Anniversary & Wedding Songs
🐾Pet Songs
🏖Retirement Songs
🏆Team Anthems
🎤Roast Songs
🛶Trip Songs
📎Corporate Jingles

Pricing

Three tiers. Each one a different level of commitment to the bit.

Tier 1

The Quick Alibi

$49

  • 60–90 second custom song
  • MP3 file + lyric text
  • One style direction
  • No revision (except obvious corrections)
Start With This Tier

Tier 3

The Evidence Package

$249

  • Full song + cover art
  • 30–60 second shareable lyric video
  • MP3, lyric sheet, art, video clip
  • Custom Evidence Card included
  • One revision included
Request This Package

Personal-use songs are priced as gifts. Commercial, public-facing, or brand use requires a commercial license — see the Corporate tier or get in touch.

Corporate & Commercial Use

Custom quote. Licensing terms included. Starting at $500. Ideal for jingles, internal campaigns, events, and brand content.

Request a Quote

Make It Giftable.

A song is great. A song with a reveal is better. Add a custom printable Evidence Card — designed in the case-file style with a QR code, recipient name, occasion, and a short message. Ready to print, frame, tuck into an envelope, or hand over dramatically at the right moment.

Each card is customised to match the song and stamped Assembled to Order. It’s not a greeting card. It’s a delivery artifact.

Custom Evidence Card
+$25
Add to any tier — mention it in the intake form or request it at scope confirmation. Included automatically with The Evidence Package.

Example Songs

Placeholder previews — real audio coming soon. The stories are real. The band is assembled for the occasion.

File #001 · Birthday

The Quinceñera Anthem

Cumbia meets power ballad. Fifteen years documented in three verses, one key change, and a reference to the incident with the piñata that no one will ever fully explain.

0:00 / 2:34
Full Story · Cumbia/Pop

File #002 · Trip Song

The Paddle Trip Song

Inspired by a four-day kayak trip on the Texas Gulf Coast involving a capsize, questionable camping food, and someone who will not be named checking their phone at every portage.

0:00 / 3:01
Full Story · Indie Folk

File #003 · Corporate Jingle

The Robot Jingle

A 60-second AI startup jingle, fully self-aware about what it is. Client asked for “something that sounds human.” We delivered something that sounds exactly like a song that knew it was being written.

0:00 / 1:02
Quick Alibi · Synth Pop

File #004 · Pet Song

The Dog-Fished Blues

Written for a rescue mutt who was listed as a Labrador mix but arrived as something else entirely. Blues-adjacent. Deeply personal. Clinically accurate.

0:00 / 2:18
Full Story · Delta Blues

File #005 · Retirement Roast

The Retirement Roast

32 years. Four managers. One suspicious parking spot. Written in the style of a 1970s country send-off, with a verse that HR specifically asked us not to read at the party.

0:00 / 2:47
Evidence Package · Country

Start a Song Request

Fill this out as completely as you can. The more specific the details, the more specific the song. Vague inputs produce vague songs. Weird inputs produce memorable ones.

— Contact

— The Occasion
Rush orders are possible. Mention it and I’ll confirm availability.

— Style & Tone
References welcome. “Something like Springsteen but sadder” works fine.

— The Details

What happens next: I review your intake, confirm scope and timeline, and send a payment link. No charge until we’ve agreed on what you’re getting. Turnaround is typically 5–7 business days. Rush available on request.

Official Statement / Fine Print

Songs are AI-assisted and human-directed. You provide the story. I shape the lyrics, prompts, style direction, curation, editing, sequencing, and final delivery. The tools are synthetic. The story, judgment, taste, and questionable creative decisions are human.

This is not a song-on-demand machine. There is no button that produces a finished song from your credit card number. There is a person — me — who reads what you send, makes creative decisions about it, and assembles something intended to be worth listening to more than once.

Case File Retention. Your completed song package is retained for up to 5 years after delivery. This includes final audio, lyrics, cover art, video clips, and related delivery page assets. After 5 years, files may be deleted from the archive. Please download and back up anything you want to keep permanently.

Private delivery pages are not listed publicly, but anyone with the link may be able to view them.

— Martin Robb, The Impostor